Breaking: Ad Industry Crushed Under Weight of its Own BS

Tragic collapse of judgement destroys many of the industry’s brightest creative minds.

MINNEAPOLIS, MN— In a fatal turn of events, the entire advertising industry was buried under an avalanche of its own bullshit after years of ignoring troubling infrastructure problems eroding away at its credibility.

“It was a mountain of pure BS,” said a first responder at the scene. “They never had a chance.”

Prior to the collapse, witnesses say there were clear warning signs. “All these usually bright, creative people began posting and reposting the same self-congratulatory drivel, chasing the latest shiny new object and pursuing awards over results,” said one visibly shaken CMO, “You could see straight through it…It was tragic.”

According to people familiar with the matter, another sign of looming disaster came when agencies began willingly enabling their clients’ ill-advised addiction to the marketing fetish of the day and junk-food metrics such as basic clicks and web visits to measure effectiveness. 

“This could have been avoided,” said a distraught Sue Kruskopf, founder of KC Truth and the woman many describe as one of the Founding Mothers of Minneapolis Advertising. “We all knew the truth. We all believed in core foundational strategies with lasting impact like growing positive attention and brand affinity. But nobody had the guts to say something. They were caught in a never-ending loop of their own BS.”

While the underlying cause of the collapse is still under investigation, many believe the final blow came when one well-meaning advertising professional posted a photo of a Ramada Inn Ballroom full of old lanyard-wearing white men watching a PowerPoint titled Advertising is Dead: Long Live the Metaverse, NFTs, and the blockchain. His post caption: “So inspiring to engage with these forward-thinking humans about the future of advertising.”

Services for the industry will be held in the same Ramada Inn ballroom.

More details as they come in at

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